It’s always been the cognitive losses that scare me.
I wonder, if I lose my ability to speak or communicate, if I will also lose my ability to relish the good in life.
I have been taking mental snapshots every day of things that I enjoy and people that bring me happiness and I try to overlap my perseverating mind with this imagery in the hope that I can sear these experiences into my long term memory.
There is so much in my life to be happy about right now. I am head over heels in love with my husband. All of my children are healthy and well. I live in the house that I love.
My life has been enriched with more and better friendships than I ever thought possible.
And I am going places with people I care about. That is one of the greatest blessings of all.
This blog is especially precious to me. It has connected me with people all over the world. WordPress statistics show me the countries everyone is from and, while I love readers from everywhere, I always cheer if I see familiar, far away readers, like the people in South Africa, Russia, and the one person from the Isle of Man. When I check and see that the person from the Isle of Man has read my post, I get a rush of adrenaline and exclaim, “Yes!!” I wish I could teleport to the Isle of Man just to meet this person and hear his or her story.
On a smaller scale, I am wringing out every last bit of flavor from each bite of ice cream. Cataloging each good vibe I get, and pulling together the experiences of a happy life.
I am enjoying the good and am trying to bank it, because I have nothing to lose.
Except the memory.