My ears have deafened to the siren’s call of social media. I didn’t plan it or want it. It just happened. I noticed that when I looked around and saw other people with their phones up to their faces, I felt vaguely nauseous and sad for them. At the same time, I started picking up my phone less and less.
I have a new collection of priorities but that doesn’t mean I love my online friends any less. In fact, now I spend time thinking of how I will talk to them on the phone to hear their voices, even if I forget our conversations. I have fantasies about visiting them, whether they be elsewhere in NC, Florida, the West Coast, the UK, or St Lucia.
I crave old school contact with humans. The rarer but lasting memories. The hugs and face to face. The physical “like”, the audible “lol”.
In my daily life, my husband left a 24/7 job as a newspaper editor and now he works from home. My favorite thing in the world is to be in the same room he is in. So I am happy much of the time. Content. With all I ever wanted in front of me.
Visiting with my sons has become more powerful. Tears of happiness are forming in the corners of my eyes just thinking about them. Especially the older ones who are away at college and I don’t see as often. Aligning short visits with doctor appointments nearby fills me with delight. I enjoy knowing that they are living life to the fullest. I am comforted by the probability that a treatment will be solidified and ready by the time they might need it. If they need it.
I have started a medicine that, if it works, will curb my perseverations. It will take a few months to know, but already I seem to be able to dissect difficulties that I encounter and sort out what is HD and what is not. Doing so also seems to diffuse things where it didn’t before.
So I am enjoying the simple life. Happy to be in my home and ever grateful for the help in securing it. It is filled with windows and brightened even more by the unusual, massive snowfall. I am filled with love for my friends from everywhere and wish you all a peaceful 2018.
Maybe I will see you soon!